Honking for Jesus

I can honestly say that when I decided to become a Christian, I was doing it on a trial basis.

There were a lot of stereotypes that I didn't want to fit into, and there were a lot of conditions that I gave God in order to make our relationship work.

I would not be making any lifestyle changes; I would not not be begging people for their souls, and I certainly was not planning to get up early on a perfectly good Sunday morning.

So God and I worked this way for a while, but, I have to admit, our relationship wasn't really going anywhere. I had a strange feeling that I was missing something, but I did not want to let go of who I thought to be me. I was afraid my friends might laugh at me or people might think me a religious nut.

I was not going to become that person.

I loved Jesus, but I was not, under any circumstances, going to honk.

What I knew deep down and refused to admit was that this God thing could really go somewhere if I would lower the boundaries I had set for Him. He wasn't working in my life because I was not giving Him a place in my life to work.

However, there was something inside me that just kept persisting, and it kept telling me that there was more. I couldn't shake it off, and I couldn't just keep going like I was, no matter how much I wanted to. After a lot of inner turmoil, in a sudden moment one night, I asked God to take over my life.

He did.

He changed my life slowly. I took baby steps as I learned to walk with Him, and He always held onto to me so I wouldn't fall too far. Looking back, I see every stepping stone He placed before me, and each one brought me closer and closer to Him.

He is still giving me footing on every step I take, and although I fall in the water more times than I want to admit, when I reach for Him, He never fails me.

Truly, I have been born again and I cannot believe what God did for me once I lowered the walls between us; everything I was so afraid of has become the very glue that holds me together.

So, I am now the person that I did not want to become, but strangely, it is exactly the person I want to be.

And I will gladly honk, because I love Jesus.

Meg Duncan